Anyone who knows me, knows just how much I love a good exploitation film. Show me a sex infused gore rampage, fueled by world class villains, and I'll be in a stellar mood for the rest of the day.

There's just something about taking all these explicit themes that society seems to detest so much, and blowing them into ridiculous proportions that I can't get enough of.

The point of exploitation movies is simply the more depraved, immoral, twisted and crazy it is, the better!
And man, you've got to love it.

The modern master of mainstream exploitation movies, is obviously dearest Quentin Tarantino.

If you've ever seen a Tarantino movie (which most people have, I think?), you'll know that he pretty obviously shares my love for exploitation films, and draws a lot of inspiration from them himself, especially  for the double feature he helped direct, namely, "Grindhouse".

Grindhouse is an homage to over-the-top, sleazy exploitation cinema, split into two different movies, directed by Quentin Tarantino and Robert Rodriguez, respectively.
Chock full of deadly babes, crazy southerners (with guns), car chases with people strapped to the hood, cheerleaders, mutated military officers, a jar full of pickled testes (i'm not fucking with you),  loss of limbs and life, and of course, lapdances, these two films showcase everything about the genre perfectly.

First off you have Death Proof. Some would say it's a slasher, though to quote Tarantino himself, it more follows the structure of a slasher in the first half, and then kind of deviates from that and becomes more of a thriller of sorts in the second half. With a wide female cast, and one of the best villains in modern day horror there is, Death Proof is a gem. Not for everyone, but definitely worth trying out, especially if you want to see what is most likely the coolest car chase EVER.
Just... take my word for it, okay?

And then there's Planet Terror.
Envision... a psycho Doc with an itch to snap both his wife's and her lesbian lover's necks, a thick fog of toxic gas that will most likely make you rot and mutate (there's pus and flesh eating as well), an ex gogo dancer with no leg, a WHOLE lot of barbecue, and some batshit crazy spanish twins. Who babysit.
Now, that might sound really cool and all, but honestly, it's nothing compared to all the other glorious shit Rodriguez has packed into this film.
That's only a TASTE of the apocalyptic glory that is this movie.
It's all crazy stunts and guns, along with a dash of death and decay.

Rush to the Grindhouse, kids.

Impending Apocalypse Due to Exhaustion?

Jeremy Irons reading Lolita in the background, black coffee, and a resolved case of writer's block got me through the night, and I'm ready for a new day... Hahahaha, I fucking wish.

It's Friday morning, and I'm in full on zombie mode.
If I don't get my hands on more coffee, we're looking at a possible apocalyptical situation here, guys.

At least I don't seem to be decaying... well, physically.

Mentally is a whole different matter, haha.

I do seem to have gotten a grip of poetry, though, and I think I'm ready to share my work thus far.

It's not perfect, but I was toying around with the concept of religion, redemption and innocence, and this was kind of the result.

I'd be thrilled to get feedback. I'm quite open to constructive criticism, so bring it on:)

"death of a saint"

bruises blossoming beneath a white cotton veil

he thought of her dainty neck

the flimsy stem of a blossoming daisy

dusty yellow hair, spilling across the floor like a halo

waiting for a rapture

ugly duckling, strange swan

the tragedy was her own doing

bitter thoughts of his father, the fallen king

a misread tale of a man who claimed too much

she was, he told himself, but a concept living solely in the minds of robed men

and young girls with bitter mothers

a cross hung from her daisy neck, and gave him relief

a temporary solace

her holiness was dripping honey, and he was hungry for virtue

she watched him with wide eyes, pale blue and blessed with innocence

there was but a moment of purity between them, perishing with his touch

super charged, sacrilegious and raw

empty and condemned,

the illusion of an angel

perfect picture of a saint

she said it was all fairytales

so he ended her story

I'm actually afraid it's a bit pretentious?
I'm wondering if other people are going to get it, or if I've just spent too much time in my own company to know, haha.

I mean, this isn't my best work by far, but I think it's kind of nifty?
Poetry isn't really my forte, but at least I'm not huddled up in fetal position weeping about how everything I do sucks, which is usually a good sign... but you never know, haha.

On a different note, I think today's going to be quite relaxed.
One of the books on meditation and mindfulness that I ordered arrived, so I'm going to delve into that for a while, and maybe read a chapter or two of Needful Things, if I feel the need for fiction (I always feel the need for fiction, who am I kidding).

I'm planning on buying some hair dye, just to darken my color a bit for intensity and whatnot, so I guess I'll do that in not too long.

I also have plans with the lovely Maria.
Not quite sure what they consist of yet, but I'm over the moon seeing as I haven't seen her in over half a year.

Other than that I just want to take a few walks and get some coffee with friends.
Maybe go out tonight, we'll see how I end up feeling.

"Little Maya" and all the shit I want

Okay, first of all, my birthday's in like ten days, HOLLA.

Second of all, someone needs to make me stop saying "holla"...

So basically, I'm always "the young one".

Having older friends and all is cool, but sooner or later, you get sick of always being the youngest.

At one point I'm pretty sure I was widely known at "Little Maya", haha.

But I'll be 16 in a few days, which will basically put me on the same playing field at everyone else...

Well, for a few months, at least.

My dear mother has interrogated me about having a party and such,

but I think I'll be doing that on my own time.

I mean, I'm almost scared if I don't it'll turn into one of those full blown MTV things,

and I'll be sitting on a curb on my 16th birthday, crying because my car isn't covered in the pink diamonds I wanted.

Except for how I can't drive until I'm eighteen, BUT STILL.

In fact, I think my wish list is pretty reasonable.

I basically said "If you get me an Xbox or a PS3, that'd be awesome. If you get me two baby rats, that would be ever cooler".

Yes, my need for a gaming console is pretty dire (and I can't decide... I want a PS3 but I also want to play Fable because I'm lame), but I've wanted two rats ever since I was a wannabe emo kid at twelve,

reading Holly Black's "Tithe", and sucking every bit of the protagonist's ethereal coolness to me as if it were the last drops of fantasy I'd ever enjoy.

I think I might have FINALLY convinced her, but if I'm mistaken, then that's alright.

I'll just wait until I move out I guess?

Other than rodents and consoles, I've put together a little visual wishlist.

I think it's a bit late for it to become reality, but hey, a girl can dream.

And I might just order some of these items this upcoming summer...

But to be honest my style will probably have reinvented itself by then anyhow, so why bother, haha.

Biker Skirt from NAVEN, $154.00, Black Faux Leather

Here Comes Trouble Tee from Wildfox Couture, $64.00

Hidden Lace Jacket from NASTYGAL, $78.00

Chained Velvet Pouch from NASTYGAL, $28.00

Strapped in Racerback Dress from NASTYGAL, $58.00

Mario Circle Shades from NASTYGAL, $18.00

Haylie Platform Heels by Betsey Johnson, $138.00

           

Ah, fashion never ceases to amuse me...

In other news, I've been doing a whole lot of nothing lately.

I've had a lot of time to reflect, though, which is always lovely:)

I'm kind of running low on blog-spiration, so if you have any ideas, please leave a comment telling me what you'd like.

I'm pretty sure you can comment anonymously, so knock yourselves out, creeps.

A post in which Maya sounds like a crazy hippie

The amount of times someone's walked into my room the past week, only to be met by me sourly saying "go away, I'm meditating" is kind of hilarious.

I've been doing a lot of reading about consciousness, and since my acupuncture has been going so extremely well (my sleep pattern is straightening itself out... slightly ironic seeing at it's 2 a.m right now, BUT NONETHELESS) I've decided to move on to mindfulness and meditation.

It sounds fucking loopy, though, doesn't it? I mean, a bit new age-y, at the least.
But what I've come to discover is that it's not so crazy at all.

What you're basically doing, is learning to master your own thoughts, in a very logical way, if I do say so myself.
When you can calm yourself with a few breaths, and focus on nothing else (it's harder than it sounds, I promise you), you find that you'll start having an easier time concentrating in your day to day life.

I've been practicing mindfulness, which basically allows me to observe my own thoughts as I meditate, and reflect over them.
Sometimes I'll manage to dig up some horrible, embarrassing episode of my life that makes me want to bury myself in the snow, but whilst meditating, I have to let that embarrassment go, and simply... observe it.  Evaluate it.

And despite how painful it is at first, you slowly find yourself growing comfortable with it, and more comfortable with yourself.
When you can start to map out your feelings, and really explore yourself like that, your understanding for the whole ordeal really increases.
Which in turn has led to a number of interesting results.

For example, I find I have more self irony lately. Like HEAPS.
And you have to understand how much of a big deal that is, because I'm one of those people who is CONSTANTLY humiliating themselves.
So now that I've come to terms with it, I'm actually a WHOLE lot happier.

Also, since I've taken such a big burden off my mind by actually DEALING with my issues, my attention span seems to have expanded.
I can actually focus on things now... which is pretty damn nifty, if you ask me.

How's Your Qi Flowin'?

Well, yesterday morning I had an appointment at an "alternative" clinic.
After about half an hour of talking about my high stress levels, irregular sleep pattern, and
energy deficiency, I was, I kid you not,
booked for a an emergency acupuncture session.

Is it just me, or is that... kind of hilarious? Just the idea of it, you know.
Sitting in the waiting room, I kept envisioning a long, greasy haired man clad in tie dye scrubs or something.

Can you imagine? "Your aura is filthy, we have to cleanse it NOW. You're very lucky we caught this in it's early stages, if it had gotten any worse your qi would have been seriously blocked".
I've obviously put too much thought into this, haha.

The fantasy version turned out to be a lot more amusing than  reality, which is generally the case.
The slightly overweight, balding doctor was kind of funny though, in a "i'm not sure if i'm comfortable with you knowing my personal information" kind of way.

On an equally creepy note, apparently dog wigs is a new trend.

I am honestly at a loss. I don't know whether I want to cry or laugh.
This is equal parts hilarious as it is horrifying and tragic and it's like... emotion overload.
I feel like my head is going to explode like those Austin Powers sexbots or something.

I bet this will prompt Nicki Minaj to get a dog,
and give it like 5 different names to match each one of her personalities... god, the world's a scary place

While we're posting images, I just need to share this with you

All credit to the great Robert, who was the nurse at a summer camp I used to attend.
Awesome guy, through and through.
Plus, I like anyone who will take the time to photoshop pictures of me, haha.
Well, as long as they're using their photoshop powers for... good?

In other news, I'm currently re-reading The Heart Shaped Box, by Joe Hill, who is one of my absolute favorite authors.
I remember reading it the first time when I was 12, and being absolutely intrigued by the strange, macabre premise, as well as depth and emotional content.
While it might not be his most sophisticated piece of work, I think it will always be my favourite.

So yeah... emergency acupuncture, wigs for pets, photoshop and Joe Hill, I think that sums it up.

Have a good one! (I sound like a 40 year old suburbanite, shoot me)

Stuff that might be handy knowing...

Well, let's start off simply...
I'm Maya, and I'm currently living in Oslo, Norway.
I'm half Norwegian, half American and, as you probably could tell from my semi-idiotic url, kind of look like something that fell out of a UFO.

It's fun though, sometimes I scare people by threatening to probe them while they're sleeping...
It proves quite effective, really.

Otherwise you'll usually find me at home, studying, reading, blogging and playing games, or at a some café philosophizing with norway's youngest and brightest...
Pity most of our conversations revolve around boys, girls, and social politics.

But hey, it's all in the name of youth and "the high school experience", as I like to call it.
Actually, that should be the name of Disney's next ride.
God knows they'd spoil it by making everyone sing and dribble or something...

I'm a self-proclaimed movie buff, and will gladly gush about my favourite features when asked.
My room looks like a natural disaster at all times, and I kind of like it that way.
I think it's my way of nesting, really. Or maybe that's just my apparent laziness acting up.
OH WELL.

I suppose I should add a picture of myself here as well

Aaaaaand I'm out.

The day has come...

I finally got a proper blog.
After plenty of requests from my followers on tumblr
(I run a low maintenance picture and personality blog, surprise surprise) I caved.

As I try to not get too personal on my tumblr, I will be directing most such thing here.

Prepare to take part in the shenanigans, slightly neurotic outfit coordinations,and witty quips from my day-to-day life. Though I must advise you to not get your hopes up...
I don't quite have a knack for things that require effort and/or commitment, haha.

I suppose I'll start off by writing an "about me" post...
Which will definitely make me feel like an egomaniacal loser, but hey, what WON'T people do to be accepted on the internet nowadays?
I'm sure I'll power through... somehow.

Over and out for now, then.